Top Tips For Divorcing Parents From A Child Of Divorce


Several weekends ago, I celebrated a belated Mother’s Day and birthday with my extended family. One of the pictures taken reflects four generations of our family: my mother on one side and my father on the other. That may not seem noteworthy, but they have been divorced for 41 years. If you were to look at my family photo album of the last 30 years, you might be even more surprised to see that my parents are pictured in the most important milestones of my life – and my children’s’ lives. In fact, until her passing in 2017, my step-mother is also routinely reflected in the pictures with my mom and dad – all three of them smiling while sitting close together at the event du jour and often with me smiling in the middle of them.

My parents gave me the gift of not having to choose which parent to invite to important events and the lack of worry about how to seat them. Long before the concept of “co-parenting” was widely discussed in the family law world, my parents made a conscious decision to handle their divorce with my sister and me as their top priorities. That does not mean they were perfect, but I am grateful that they took the steps they did to preserve our (albeit changed) family for future milestones.

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